Express Yourself: Tutus in a Sea of Cocktail Dresses

On January 20th I celebrated my dream birthday: seeing one of my favorite DJs (Diplo) in a freakin’ crazy city (Atlantic City) with two of my best friends from college.

After listening to middle school tunes such as Misery Business and LG FUAD during the car ride, passing out for a nap immediately upon arrival in a huge party city, my vegetarian friend accidentally ordering a burger for dinner, and losing $5 in the slot machines, we were ready to rave.

On goes the tutus, LED accessories, and kandi (handmade bracelets traded in order to represent a specific event, moment, connection, person, etc)

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(^my collection)

Little did I know, and despite the other rave-esque shows I have attended in AC, “rave gear” is not usually permitted in the Borgata

Awkward

And so we roll up covered in neon and beads, are some how let into the Mixx night club, and instantly realize how out of place we look (even though we were some of the first people there…that’s a sign….)

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Hey, at least we matched the staff in their fluffies & booty shorts.

The crowd continued to arrive in their cute cocktail dresses and heels as we danced about with the sway of our tutus. We met a few awesome girls in the bathroom (there ya go boys, that’s what we really do in there- meet new friends) and a group of people who were so excited it was my birthday that they screamed “HAPPY BIRTHDAYYY!” to me any time we crossed paths throughout the entire night…which was a lot… I didn’t hate it.

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It was one of the most unique raving experiences I’ve ever had, and I’m so glad I was able to have such an experience. There were no light gloves or crazy outfits (aside from ours, I suppose) that I am so used to seeing, but every one was still all there for the same reason: the music.

I received numerous hugs from strangers wishing me a happy birthday,  gave away an entire arm’s-worth of kandi to those who were interested, explaining the meaning if they didn’t know, and was able to join in screaming my lungs out and dancing my worries away with a group full of diverse people united by music.

One of the girls that I met, after I traded her a special piece of kandi that I made, had no kandi to trade back, so she literally took one of her regular bracelets off of her arm and insisted that I take it. It was such an amazing gesture-I almost cried.

I had some interesting conversations such as the guy who claimed raves are only fun if on Molly and when I told him I disagreed-I’ve gone sober, he apologized and said he would take away the stereotype (thanks for further imbedding that negative stigma into the culture, sir) , or the guy who said “I’m surprised they let you in like that” and when I wasn’t sure if I should be offended or not, he continued “but I’m glad they did. Your outfits are awesome!”.

I also had some interesting encounters such as the older man who kept trying to dance with each of my friends by casually showing up behind us even after we consistently said “No thank you”. If you are not my boyfriend, and you’re not because I’m single, then I do NOT want to grind with you at a rave. Sorry sirs.

But the absolute best moment of the entire night: Diplo played a BIRTHDAY mix, and despite the fact that I met others who were celebrating their birthdays that night, and birthdays are pretty common things- I took his mix very, very personally (after all, I have been tweeting to him about January 20th for weeks now…) And when it came on, the awesome people who were near me all surrounded me, pointed to me, and serenaded me.

Like. What. What an AMAZING present! I had half a rave sing a birthday mix at a DIPLO show to me!

So, I have to admit that it was unique dancing in a tutu among a sea of business-attire and cocktail dresses, but it was an amazing experience because, and i reiterate, we were still all there and united for the same reason: the music. (Oh, and my birthday)

And that’s what it’s all about.

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**Also, if I could only still do a handstand I would have Expressed Myself all over that floor.

22 Images That Made Me Scratch My Head and Think “..but why?”

I joined the world of smart phones in June 2012 after my trusty, but evidently dumb ENV-3 decided to stop working as a phone, refused to allow certain letters to show in texts, and the screen popped off… thus becoming entirely useless, except for the awesome street-cred I got when showing up to parties with this guy:

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Jokes

Once I was finally united with my baby (otherwise known as my Galaxy Nexus) I began to see the world in a whole new way. AKA I started taking note of the odd, hilarious, and ironic images around me, especially while at college. (I mean, college is a strange concept anyway: Let’s place all of these confused kids together on a block, take away the adults, and see what happens….)

SO, here are the 22 strangest, funniest, or most ironic images I have captured while at this strange institution called college, things that I have noticed and just thought to myself “…but why?”

1. The important staples of any college party: 5 pieces of cheese, a few crackers, brownie crumbs, a solo cup…and a Natty. 

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Clearly they don’t offer a “How to Host a Proper Gathering” course, here. At least you can wash down the half a piece of cheese you manage to acquire with some oh-so-delicious Natty light.

2. I think they’re doing “vegetable” wrong…

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How to get that beefy flavor without having to chew it!

3. Birthday wan-tan.

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The name says it all. For when you want the celebration but not the cake.

4. Birthday Explosion.

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This might be a fire-hazard…

5. College student, or culinary genius?

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Nutella & PB on one piece, mustard and cheese on the other…

I’ll admit this was me…it seemed like a good idea at the time…

6. Lovely and affordable wall decor for the student on a budget.

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Lookin’ like a fool with yo’ pants on the wall.

7. Pants on the wall with a plastic pony in them.

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Because that makes perfect sense…

8. A pair for every room in your tiny college-owned house makes it feel more like home.

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I think we’re really onto a new trend here…

9. Don’t forget your classy table settings.

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Make sure it’s crappy alcohol- the cheapest empty handle of vodka will make the best looking vase.

10. Childhood toys can also be used for decorating your college housing. 

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Check to see if it’s in some weird assortment that will probably fall down soon though- it keeps the suspense high.

11. This…just this… 

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Rollin’ wit da homiez.

12. Closet door removed from the closet can also make a convenient coat rack!

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Or it can be left on the closet and remain a convenient coat rack…

13. Moochers gonna mooch.

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Ladybug drinking my beer….anything for a free drink around here.

14. The mathematical equation proving that God exists?

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Or studying for finals for different classes made everyone a little crazy….

15. That…seems illegal. 

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16. At least we’re all mature here.

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Located conveniently in the bathroom so you can take notes as you do your doodie.

17. Fire pit gone horribly wrong.

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Or amazingly right?

18. Kiddie pool on top of deck? 

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Why not? We have “adult” supervision.

19.  I question my test taking abilities…I question even more how they work out for me…

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But I’m glad they do.

20. My Photo notes.

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Use a filter, and burn the THC? I swear this is about photography and not marijuana in any way….

21. The perfect place for Mr. Potato Head.

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Clearly that dish washer isn’t ever used for its intended purpose…

22. Sudden sleep for women- the new roofie?

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Like…why does this exist?

And there ya have it, 22 things I have seen that have struck me as sharing-worthy to celebrate my 22nd birthday. (Okay, I just threw that in there, the number was a coincidence.)

**Some of these strange things were my own doing…I’m not sorry…Pants are a convenient decoration and I love playing with toys. 

5 Things That Bother Me Probably More Than They Should

1. Hashtags on Facebook. Let me give you a little insight as to why hashtags work: They create links to the other people who also hashtagged the same hashtag that you hashtagged….on TWITTER…or Instagram, even. However, Facebook does not use this technology and therefore you just look like an idiot when you #hashtag #everything #in #your #Facebook #Status.

which brings me to my next annoyance….

2. Incorrect Usage of Hashtags…on Facebook. Clearly you already don’t understand the way hashtags work if you are using them on Facebook, so I really shouldn’t hold your ignorance against you, but if you’re going to use hashtags, you should probably be aware that this would be an incorrect usage:

“Zomg FB Friends, I had THEE most amaziiingg burger earlier which I will most definitely instagram later because I know you all want to see it but my hashtags probably won’t work there because I don’t know how to use them #Best Burger Ever.”

The word you linked there…was “#Best”. Just Best. If you ever want to migrate over to the world where hashtags are socially acceptable (i.e. not Facebook), and you were curious as to who else thought they were having the best burger ever, you should be aware that spaces will ruin your linking. Therefore instead of saying #Best Burger Ever, you should say #BestBurgerEver .

It’s not a middle school dance, you don’t need to leave room for Jesus in between your words when hashtagging.

3. You’re/Your/They’re/Their/There.  I know this is a big topic of controversy in the grammar-world and that it is brought up quite often on social media sites. AKA some people think it’s an easy enough mistake and not something to worry about annnnd then there are people such as myself that say…no. Just, no. They have completely different meanings.

Would you write “Hey, can you get me I scream?” instead of “ice cream” just because they sound the same? No. Why not? Because you would look like a moron and/or your intended meaning would be completely skewed. So learn the difference between you’re and your, and they’re, their, and there.

What makes me the most ecstatic is when people mess up these simple words inconsistently: “Their are people over they’re and there going with they’re friends over to there.”

Like, if you’re going to mess them up, at least be consistent with the mistakes….

**We all are allowed to make these mistakes every once in awhile. We’re human. I understand, but come on. Some people, native-English speakers, just really don’t know the differences. And letting people incorrectly use these words over and over and over again is just a sign of our laziness and apathy.

4. “I axed him where the liberry is”

You axed him? Should I call the authorities and put a warrant out for your arrest? And what exactly is a liberry? Is that a nice cross-breed between the lime and the strawberry? That sounds delicious!

5. *Sitting down enjoying the movie in a public theater, quiet/sad/romantic/moving scene comes onto screen, I’m really into it, and BOOM “I’M A REDNECK WOMAN, I AIN’T NO HIGH CLASS BROAD” starts blaring from the woman’s purse down the aisle from me*

Thank you, lady. Thank you for ruining even just 30 seconds of my over-priced movie ticket. Did you not see the FIFTEEN advertisements during the previews to turn off your cellphone? Were they not clear enough for you? Were you so positive of your lack of popularity that no one would call you during the movie?

I would like to sum this up with an endearing message I wish I would have left for the lady I had the unpleasant experience of sharing a theater with this afternoon:

“Dear Lady who took 10 minutes deciding on which popcorn size to buy as I patiently waited in line behind you, I really loved it when your phone went off during the last song in Les Mis. No, no, please take all the time you need bending over and fumbling through your purse in order to turn it off. Your generic ringtone definitely adds something unique and appreciated to the soundtrack.”

IT’S JUST COMMON COURTESY.

What Not To Ask A College Senior

Here’s a tip to adults, children, high school students, underclassman, elders, basically anyone other than a college senior: The most ANNOYING question you can ask a senior in college is “What are you doing after graduation?”

Do you think we know that? Even if we do have plans, do you think we want to discuss life-after-college with you? Or even THINK about life after college?

Alright, I’m generalizing a bit right now because there are those lucky fellas majoring in finance or something who have had job offers since they were freshmen, and those who somehow have the biggest savings account in the world despite attending a $50k/year private university and are back-packing Asia for a TBA amount of time after graduation, but as for a good portion of us: WE.DO.NOT.KNOW.WHAT.WE.ARE.DOING.COME.MAY.

I realized how much this question bothered me personally today when my neighbor came into my house as I was sitting in my pajama pants at about 1 PM and trolling the interwebz and began asking me questions about post-grad.

*Smiling politely* “I’m not sure yet.”

Neighbor: “What do you mean you’re not sure….? What are you going to do? What can you do?”

Sir, I don’t know what about the phrase “I’m not sure yet” you did not comprehend, but I am not sure yet. I do not know. I have no idea. Is that clear?

Apparently not, because this conversation proceeded the same way for about 5-10 more minutes until I progressively got more aggressive with my answers “I DON’T KNOW!” and my dad chimed in “How about this new moulding on the wall…?” directing the subject away from my pathetic lack of future plans towards our lovely living room decor.

Thanks Dad. Always there to save the day.

It’s not that I don’t enjoy thinking about or even discussing the future, but my future is wide open right now. I am focusing on deadlines for volunteer programs, job searching, internships, places to live, etc in my free time alone.

It seems as though many of my classmates are doing the same over this winter break.

Every time I talk to a fellow-senior, they are in the middle of applying to graduate school, or finishing up a resume, or writing a personal statement for a volunteer program. And the phrase “the uncertainty of my future” comes up almost daily in conversation with them.

We are all uncertain. We are all young. We are in our early twenties. Why do we need to know what what we are doing after graduation? Why do we need to know where we will be a year from now?

We don’t. And we won’t. We are still figuring ourselves out. We are still mid-applications and mid-deadlines and mid-confused.

Let us be. Let us figure ourselves out. Let us be overwhelmed with our possibilities. Why is there so much pressure on us that we need to know who we are supposed to be as a post-grad?

If you are asking us “What are you doing after graduation?” to be nice or out of general interest: that’s fine. But when we say “I’m not sure yet”, let it go. Let us explore and let us figure it out. Give us advice, sure. But don’t be disappointed with our acceptance of the fact that the future is wide open to us.

And for the love of God do not, NOT relentlessly ask us over and over again expecting a different answer. (That’s a sign of insanity according to Einstein. So who’s the unstable one now!?)

But be aware that by asking us “What are you doing after graduation?” you are forcing us to live in the future. It’s my last semester in college. I’ll figure it all out on my own time within this semester, but for now, I’m going to focus on living it up these last few months of freedom I have left. When I’m not physically working on those deadlines and applications, I’d prefer to not have to think or talk about them. I’d rather think or talk about that upcoming concert or the wonderful friends I’ve spent the last four years of college with.

So if I, or any other college senior politely responds “I’m not sure yet”, take a hint that we don’t want to discuss post-graduation plans with you. Not now, not until we have it figured out.

A New Year, A Not-So-New Me

And so we arrive in the year 2013, the year of change as you all make your resolutions to lose weight, be a better person, fall in love, yadda yadda yadda.

My resolution? Keep my sanity as I graduate college and enter the world of “adulthood”. Or should I change that to : Accept the fact that I will be entering the world of “adulthood”? 

I have been attending school for as long as I can remember, from pre-pre school all the way to college. And in May, after 18 years of only knowing how to survive as a student, I will be thrust into the demanding universe of job-finding and paying off all of those student loans.

As I was shopping with mom yesterday, I came to the harsh realization that I am no where near ready to be an adult; not for the stereotypical working-my-life-away-in-order-to-pay-the-bills-lifestyle that I think of when I think of growing older.

We walk into Charlotte Russe where my mom points out a pair of nice dress pants that were on sale. I nod in agreement that they were in fact nice…. and on sale… and without a second glance I run to some brightly colored items hanging on a clearance rack. Needless to say, I walk out of the store with newly purchased leggings and a hot pink bandeau.

Not quite the professional attire that I could wear to the workplace…

Thinking back to all of the things I have bought in the last year, no professional attire, shoes, or accessories were on the list. In fact, I own more tutus than I do dress pants. None of my skirts are length-appropriate, and my shoes are entirely way too high to ever walk into an office.

Is this my way of avoiding the real world? I look more forward to upcoming parties, raves, and festivals than I do graduation day. Graduation is barely even on my radar.

Am I neglecting to purchase or even care about professional attire as some sort of subconscious protest to growing up? I feel as though I am slowly regressing to childhood as opposed to diving in to the excitement that my early twenties can bring.

Or am I simply having an early-twenties-crisis– the common ancestor to the mid-life crisis, but instead is when one is on the brink of their future and they face all of the true potential and opportunities they have, and are so completely overwhelmed and frightened by their own unending possibilities that they refuse to accept or realize them?

It might be a new year, a year of change for all of us, but as of now- I’ll just keep being the same me… dancing around in tutus and colorful bracelets and waiting for the day that I realize where I want to go and who I want to be.

I don’t expect to figure it all out, nor do I expect to have to give up the fun and wonder of my twenties, but I’m excited to go along for the journey as I make mistakes, fail, succeed and learn.